Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Shock move for LABC Taupo team













-- Controversial axing overshadowed by large peleton of strange names

LABC PRESS RELEASE - Auckland:

In what can only be described as controversial circumstances, LABC team captain “Whizzer Wilson” has axed club stalwart Martin “Thomo” Thomson from the club’s A team for the upcoming annual Round Taupo Classic.

In the face of a mounting challenge from the Legendary Trade Tools Team of Mcleay, McFinch and McGechie, Wilson has been forced to bolster his team with club “gun” Richard “Ricochet” Carter .

The team will therefore be made up the aforementioned “Whizzer”, John “Gnarls” McKelvie and of course the indubitable “Ricochet”.

Understandably Thomson is somewhat gutted by this turn of events in what would have been his tenth consecutive year of riding the daunting 160k.

Furthermore it has been reported that Wilson has gone one step further by bringing out even more of his “stars” in what could be construed as almost a desperate bid for honour.

Thus lining up in LABC colours will also be Pete” Lostpork” Missingham , Andrew “Wily” Webster, Doug ‘Cable Bay Kid’ Todd, Mike “ Its All About The Bike” Pengelly‘, and club co-founder, Murray “Handkerchief” Gate.

Predictions are that “Ricochet” should finish so far in front of Clydesdales such as McGechie that he will have time to start the afternoon’s proceedings at about 10.00am.

Ends.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

LABC confirms North Island tour



















-- 2011 Autumn Classic - Auckland to Wellington six day tour; first day Auckland to Raglan. Ouch! Tour fully booked.

On Saturday, 5 March, 2011, at a time agreeable with weather conditions and the emotional state of LABC riders and their supporters, a peleton of 20 LABC riders will depart for Wellington.

Taking in some of North Island's most popular destinations - notably Mangakino, Ekatahuna, and Dannevirke (home of the sign with a Viking in a posing pouch - WTF!) - riders will cover a total of 835km (averaging 139km a day).

Tour organiser Whizzer Wilson says there are two openings for support van drivers.

Finding God


















-- Ever elusive Lord pops up all over Coromandel

Ever the opportunist, God has singled out cyclists for a new recruitment drive.

LABC members competing in the recent K1 and K2 road race reported multiple sightings of the big fella’s second in command, The Holy Ghost.

A source familiar with cycling-themed religious encounters said member reactions were mixed, with angry fist shaking contrasting more conciliatory communion pitched at merciful intervention.

Other members went further, recanting heretical views in the hope that blessed acquiescence would somehow propel them to the finish line faster than under their own Godless steam.

Photos here